Monday, August 8, 2011

aha!

yesterday i had a big aHA moment. 

i was sitting in the chapel, waiting for church to start
heart beating, very fast, as i prepared to say the opening prayer for our sacrament meeting.

the husband was scheduled to say the prayer but he had to leave unexpectedly to pick someone up
so it was all up to me.

and then the bishop announced that someone else was saying the prayer.
part of me said "phew"
the other part was a little sad...weird i know.

anyway...

that set me up for the rest of sacrament meeting.

i was feeling the spirit really strongly yesterday.

then i realized why.

i have been expecting the feel the spirit as of lately, and often times i do not feel it.
this can be really frustrating.

i want the spirit to be with me all the time, but the problem is...that it isnt.

then the aHA came. 

i cannot expect the spirit to be with me if i am not actively pursuing it. 

the key word here folks is actively.

without a doubt the spirit will be with me if I am actively seeking the spirit and doing the right things...
if i pray.
if i read the scriptures.
if i actually pay attention in church...
 rather than tuning out merely hoping that i can feel the spirit...
if i do all the right things...
i will feel the spirit.

why is something so simple like this so hard to figure out sometimes?!

2 comments:

  1. I'm sorry you didn't get to say the prayer. I wish you could have. I like the way you describe getting the spirit you do actively have to work for it. Good thoughts Kristen. You talk as if you've been LDS all your life. Thanks for your sweet example.

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  2. I think we also need to assume that if we are doing what we need to, we are feeling the spirit! We can literally be ONE with the Spirit if we are worthy and doing our best. It's a learning process. We are all in it with you!! xoxoxo

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