thank you facebook...

so...finally i have finished the "story" of my baptism...questions? they are always welcome... and actually they are encouraged! i would hope that if you are following my blog, and i am reaching out to you, that you would reach on back if you did have a question... about anything. if you'd rather ask anonymously be my guest!

so now what?... it was my goal in starting this blog to write about everyday occurrences that are different now that i am a member of the LDS church. i thought it important, however, to tell you about me, and to give you all (if there is anyone even reading) a background as to where i am coming from before jumping into anything....but now you have the background...and here i go...

facebook... how i love it, and how i hate it...however, recently it has been a really good tool for me to serve as a reminder as to why i do not drink alcohol anymore. i am constantly getting updates about friends (many of whom are more so acquaintances now) and reading the "status updates" on the infamous newsfeed. (for those of you who are not on facebook, this is the opening page of facebook that highlights some of the status' your facebook friends have written about themselves)...anyway, as of recently it seems that there has been an outpouring of status' about drinking...and more so about the morning/day after a "night out"... after reading a few of these status updates i found it impossible to not think back on my past... and i realized and remembered how unhappy drinking made me...

what i really want to say is.... thank you facebook...and anonymous facebook friends who remind me that drinking makes you sick. fall down. lose things. and forget what happened the night before. not to mention it makes you act like a completely different person who makes really bad decisions while not even realizing it.

no amount of "fun" is worth any of the above mentioned things.

my baptism.

the day of my baptism was nothing like i have ever experienced.

i woke up on the morning of april 19, 2008 with a smile on my face. i was ready. i got ready for the day and headed to my boyfriends house where his family was anxiously awaiting my arrival. the atmosphere in their home was nothing short of pure joy and the smiles on everyone's faces made me even happier than i already was.

the drive to the church, where the baptism was to take place, seemed much longer than it actually was. it was quiet in the car as we listened to the mormon tabernacle choir, and gave me time to really reflect on the event that was about to happen. as we got closer and closer to the church building the butterflies in my stomach became more and more intense, and by the time we reached the building, i will admit it. i was nervous.

my boyfriend and i went inside and got dressed in our white clothing... in the LDS church, individuals who are being baptized and those doing to baptizing both wear white. white not only symbolizes purity and cleanliness, but it also is symbolic of what happens after you are baptized. at baptism, a person is washed clean of their sins... they then try to live their life in the best possible way, the most pure and clean way that they can, white is a reminder of this.

after getting dressed, we returned to the room where the baptism was going to take place. i was shocked to see how many people had shown up to be with me on my special day. many friends and individuals from the church had come to support me, and most importantly, my family came. my mom came with her sister (my aunt) and my dad and his wife came, along with my brother and his girlfriend. it meant so much to me that they were all there for me on this day that was so very important to me.

as the baptism started i was nervous for so many people to be watching me. in fact i could barely concentrate on the people who were talking (i was able to chose two people to speak at my baptism)...after the first speaker, it was time for the actual baptism to take place...

in the LDS church, baptism is done by full immersion under the water in a baptismal font. as my boyfriend and i entered the font all my previous worries had disappeared. in fact, something rather amazing happened....my perspective had changed and it was as if he and i were the only ones in the room. i had forgotten that an entire room full of people was looking at me and i concentrated only on what was happening... the water was warm and i can still remember the way it felt against the baptismal clothing.

after i was baptized, i cannot describe the feelings that i was overcome with. as i write this entry i am also overwhelmed by emotion. for that reason, and because the memory is so sacred to me, i am not going to explain every detail, however i will say that i have never been so happy, and felt so clean in my entire life. it was if i was floating on the clouds and nothing could pull me down. ever.

i returned to the room where all my friends and family were, after changing into dry clothes, and the second speaker gave their talk. then the baptism was closed with a word of prayer.

i was able to meet with everyone afterward. the room was filled with happiness and time passed by very quickly. i wished that it would have lasted forever.

i want to tell you, that the emotions that i felt after i was baptized give me, without a shadow of doubt, the confidence and knowledge that i made the right decision to be baptized into the LDS faith.

my life was changed forever that day, and i am so happy that it was.

the letter...

the month leading up to my baptism went by really quickly...about a week before my baptism i was starting to feel really nervous and started questioning myself to see if i was making the right choice....the day before my baptism was a roller coaster, to say the least.

i had lost the confidence i had in my decision to be baptized and was so nervous i didnt think i would make it through the night. before i left my boyfriends house that evening he stopped me and said that he had forgotten to give me something...it was a letter from one of the missionaries father. i was a little confused as to why he would be writing to me...i mean, he didnt even know me... anyway, i drove to my apartment and read the letter before going to bed.

i am not going to say what was in the letter because it is too personal, however, i will tell you all that the words that filled the pages of the letter filled my eyes with tears, and my heart with love and joy...

the letter spoke of his trials and tribulations as a convert to the LDS church and gave me the reassurance that everything would be ok and that i truly was making the right decision.

i went to bed that night feeling so happy, excited, loved, and comforted. all because one man felt the need to write a letter to a complete stranger.

i am and will always be so grateful for that letter that i received.